Dearest Cloud, Happy birthday beautiful soul. Another beautiful day to remind me of you. You are in my heart so deeply dear friend. A candle is lit today to remember the light you are. X

30 years ago today x

yesterday my friend sent me a text to tell me Cloudia died three years ago .. I’d conveniently forgotten .. I had to really think about it because I wasn’t sure my friend had the right date .. my friend said she’d done a grief ritual .. I read the text and thought “I’m not sure I actually wanted to know” .. then immediately felt guilty .. like I was a bad person .. then felt a huge sense of relief because I hadn’t remembered .. so her death is no longer something that overwhelms me or dominates my thinking .. I have no idea why I’m buying a tree .. trees are not daughters .. I am surviving without a daughter .. life hasn’t been as meaningful or as much fun since she died .. if I’m honest it’s been truly horrible .. others close to me have died but life goes on .. and you can’t live without trees so what the heck .. I’ll buy a bloody tree .. it feels weird because if trees didn’t exist Cloudia might still exist .. but saying I hate trees is as stupid as saying I hate guns .. it’s not the gun’s fault when people die from bullet wounds someone has to pull a trigger .. Cloudia took that option .. made a choice .. it was her life and she had a right to make the choice .. we have to assume the choice was right for her .. whatever her reasons I have to respect her decision and honour it .. so I’ll buy a bloody tree .. will I feel better? nope .. trees are not daughters .. but as a symbol of hope .. I’ll buy a bloody tree!

Love Mum x

Dearest Cloud, happy birthday. It’s a beautiful frosty day today and it makes me think of the magic of you. You are missed dear girl. Lots of love Margaret

Dear Cloud, thinking of you today on your birthday . We love you and miss you x

Love mum x

Sending my love to Cloud. You are missed by so many. Gone but never forgotten ?

Sending my love to Cloud. You are missed by so many. Gone but never forgotten ?

ou are so missed little sunflower. We are so glad that you will be remembered in this beautiful way. We love you x

In memory of a beautiful girl. Lynne, Tony, Arwen and Isla.

In memory of a beautiful girl. Lynne, Tony, Arwen and Isla.

To my beautiful, loving, caring granddaughter love you granny and diesel xxx

Up in the woods Among the trees Butterflies, birds, Foxes and bees Sunshine and rain Rainbows and clouds Dragonflies, lizards And all creatures loud Dancing and singing And playing with her Holding her hands, Braiding her hair Rosemary, thyme, basil, Laurel and clove She's smiling peacefully Up in Cloud's grove. Much love. F x

Up in the woods Among the trees Butterflies, birds, Foxes and bees Sunshine and rain Rainbows and clouds Dragonflies, lizards And all creatures loud Dancing and singing And playing with her Holding her hands, Braiding her hair Rosemary, thyme, basil, Laurel and clove She's smiling peacefully Up in Cloud's grove. Much love. F x

With much love and happiness your memory will live on in nature, you are so missed xx

To the most amazing auntie and sister, sending lots of love. Love Brandon, Amy & Romy xx

Our beautiful girl

Clouds are always changing their form and flying off to new places to make sunsets and sunrises beautiful. Sometimes they become rain, just so they can touch your face again. They feed the trees and rise up to the skies again. Sev & Ciri

In memory of our beautiful Cloud

Le gaol xx